Fanest Thoughts: Home Alone

edit// i'm the baby of the family, at home and in both sides of the family (yenyen doesn't count...haha) so i'm very 嬌 (hence the nickname)...so my "tendon cyst" on my left wrist has been gone for a year or so...but because of the intense practice lately it's been hurting...yesterday, i pushed to open a door with my left hand, and it bent back and made a LOUD popping noise, and it hasn't stopped hurting since...T.t please pray, what if i have to chop off my left hand?! hahaha jk, the worst is i have to go get a surgery to remove it (although, it's gone right now...it just hurts) the reason i didn't want to remove it last time was because the doctor says it won't kill me if i kept it, but if i got surgery on it 1) it'll leave a scar 2) it might affect the nerves around it 3) it has a high chance of coming back....so i just left it...>< it hurts so much, like knives poking at it...constantly. (worst of all is, there's no one home to 撒嬌 to...just sitting here in pain and pouting...haha) 1:46am

so i'm pretty sure this is my first time being home alone through the night...i mean i've been home alone a ton of times, ever since we were living in singapore....but i've always had somebody, usually my brother (sigh, i miss him a lot again...) with me...my mom was gonna have tracy stay with me tonight, but i thought it was pointless because, i get home from work at like 9...and won't sleep till like 3/4am...and then won't get up till...NEVER. soooo no point having anyone with me...hahaha, it's fine tho, it's just like a night when parents come home really late, but this time really late would mean the whole weekend...haha three day weekend! tomorrow's grading day, no school! hooray! it's so exciting, i managed to bring ALL my grades up~ guess senioritis isn't hitting that bad yet, i can keep going...haha jk

so next week is when we go to california to do the praise night...eek! completely lift this whole trip up to God, i have no clue how it's gonna turn out and it's pretty intense planning it...haha lan fang ah yi's giving me so much stuff to do, the funny thing is, i've done half of the things before she even told me too...not because i'm high and mighty...but because i'm just OCD like that! on tuesday, she was like "you need to listen to these songs A LOT and know exactly when/what instruments have to do...it's best if you take notes" i'm like "oh...i already started" and she ignores me and repeats that same thing like 3 times then i'm like don't worry, i did it. she's like what?! show me! and i show her my extensive list...and i really only did that because i'm just OCD and like writing every little thing down =P i think that part of planning is fun tho...she wants to train me to be completely normal on stage, and now how to speak and pick up a crowd...@_@ kinda nervous...ANYWAYS, the shirt making company emailed me today and sent me a proof picture...it looks pretty awesome! i guess i'll give you guys the "sneak" preview now.